Complexes
by LilyGinnyBlack
Summary: Because, underneath the cute image, some aspects of this series are surprisingly disturbing and rather dark. A series of one-shots examining the darker hints found in Shugo Chara. In other words, characters and their complexes.
1. Complex One: Electra

_**Complexes**_

_**By: LilyGinnyBlack**_

**Disclaimer: I do not own Shugo Chara; not the characters, setting, or plot. Copyright is to Peach-Pit.**

_A/N: Hello everyone. : D This is my second Shugo Chara fanfic. This is going to be a series of eight (including this one) one-shots that focus on some of the possible complexes that can be found in Shugo Chara. Because, underneath the cute image, some aspects of this series are surprisingly disturbing and rather dark. So, these one-shots are probably going to be on the darker side, as is the case with this first chapter, because I highly doubt that little Ami-chan would or will think in such a way. I hope you enjoy it none the less. : )_

**Complex One: Electra**

I'm Papa's "little shinning star".

He showers me with pictures. The lens focusing on me, and only me, the sound of Papa's finger as it presses down on the button, and the flash letting me know that the picture was taken. I twirl around in my expensive and elaborate sweet lolita outfits, my hair tied back in pigtails, as I dance to no particular beat.

Even though I'm not a little girl anymore, Papa keeps saying how much of a "big girl" I am, I'm still only in grade school. But, when I was younger, I never noticed it before. How Papa loved taking pictures of Mama too, how he showered her with just as much-no!-even more attention than he did for me.

His "little shinning star".

Sometimes when I sing out the lyrics Papa doesn't notice, his eyes will sway over to _her_. And sometimes when I say, "Watch me, Papa, watch me!" He doesn't watch me at all.

So now, right now, with the camera zooming in and zooming out, with Papa's shouts of how cute I am and how proud he is of my ever growing singing ability, I drink it all in. I store it away, use moments like these to ease my hostility towards my own mother, who blushes whenever Papa talks to her.

Her who gets flustered and tongue tied sometimes, enough to make me so angry...

Her who takes Papa away from me and makes me so angry I want to kill her.

But, then Papa grins at me, and calls out to me, "My lovely, little shinning star." And I forget all about Mama and my hate for her.

No one knows this though, not even Papa.

_A/N: First one-shot done and done. I'm going to give you a brief explanation of what an Electra Complex is for those who don't know, since it will better your understanding of the above writing. _

_An Electra Complex is like the female version of the Oedipus Complex, in which a boy feels threatened by his father, and thus sees him (the father) as a rival for his mother's attention. Thus, an Electra Complex is when a girl feels threatened by her mother, and thus sees her (the mother) as a rival for her father's attention. It is even said that the children who have this complex have such bad thoughts as killing their parent, the one whom they perceive as the rival. A common misconception of this complex is that it also has sexual conotations behind it, which it usual doesn't, and in Ami's case it definitely doesn't. o.O; The way I see it, Ami will grow out of this complex in a year or two. P_

**-LilyGinnyBlack-**


	2. Complex Two: Lolita

_A/N: I wanted to save this complex for the end, for the very last one…but, that changed. Obviously. :") I was just listening to this wonderful song called Moi…Lolita (or Me…Lolita), a French song that I find to be rather sad (even though the beat of the song suggests otherwise) and the lyrics to be quite beautiful. I suggest everyone to check it out; it's sung by Alizee and can easily be found on YouTube. Anyway, needless to say, that song got me really wanting to write this complex…and then I just had to. I had the right music and everything! I hope you all like this, I think it turned out the way I wanted it to in the end. : )_

()

**Complex Two: Lolita**

"Hey Ikuto, look! It's a little elementary student, aren't cha gonna try and seduce her like you were doing with that little pink haired girl."

"Yeah, we all know that you have a lolicon!"

I just sigh, slinging my school bag over my shoulders. Listening as the boys that I "hang out with" make fun of the fact that they had seen me with Amu one time, ever since then they haven't relented in their teasing. Calling me a lolicon, as if!

Sure, the way Amu blushes every time I nip her ear or steal a lick of her ice cream or whisper a perverted comment her way, is cute. And the innocence in her eyes always has a way of making my own widen. The way she speaks with such confidence despite her lack of wisdom is enduring. And, her skin (if my memory serves me correctly) has a wonderful taste of strawberry to it.

That doesn't mean that I have a lolicon though.

She's just some annoying kid who always seems to find me at my worst. Healing my wounds when I get in a fight or interrupting my violin playing with her gentle gasps of amazement. And her constant name calling (just because my would-be self is a cat does **not** make me a cosplayer) and insistence that everything I think is perverted frustrates beyond reason.

But, I still go to her house to apologize whenever I do something wrong. I still go to her room when I need comfort. I still found a way to…

I don't have a Lolita complex!

Looking in the direction that my "friend" had just pointed in, all I see is some snotty nosed brat. Her hair is a mess, like she had been running around all day, and her face is stained with dirt and grass, while her smile is filled with gaping holes (suggesting the lost of baby teeth). It's disgusting. Nothing about the brat is the least bit attractive.

Amu's smile doesn't contain any missing teeth, and it's always so brilliant. Her face hardly ever has dirt and grass stains on it, even after she fought off an X egg. And her hair is so soft…

"Well, Ikuto, what do ya think?"

"Is she your kinda taste in girls?"

There laughter rings out again. And I merely huff them off. No point in making an argument out of something that the other party just wouldn't even bother listening to. After all, they could never understand my fascination with Amu.

I don't have a Lolita complex, and even if I did, it would only be for Amu. No one else.

()

_A/N: Well, there it is. I hope you all liked it and please tell me what you think of it in a review. Anyway, for those who may not know _lolicon _is, it's a Japanese shortened (or even slang) term for _Lolita complex or anyone with a Lolita complex. _A _Lolita Complex_ is probably one of the better known ones, along with the Oedipus complex, and it deals with older men having an infatuation, desire, fetish, or what have you towards younger women. A Lolita is also a term used for a promiscuous or teasing young girl._

-LilyGinnyBlack-


	3. Complex Three: Brother

_**Complex Three: Brother**_

()

When I sang, his violin was always there. When I cried, his hand was already there, wiping away the tears. Papa was nowhere nearby, and that was all Mama would ever say about him. Where he was…she never mentioned. Why he was gone…I could never work up the courage to ask. So, whenever Ikuto spoke of how Papa had died. Mama would always yell at him. Even though I didn't know where Papa was, it didn't matter, Ikuto looked after me. He was there for me. He was everything to me.

I loved him.

I needed him.

Ikuto was my brother. He was my protector. He was my father. And…he was my lover. That was how I liked him best. When he would wrap his arms around me in a hug, hold me close. Those moments were so rare, so that made me cherish them even more. I still blush when I think of how he would place his hand on my forehead, checking for a fever whenever I happened to look flushed or sick. My lips are constantly longing to rest over his.

And I want to sing so loud and so long, making sure that Ikuto can always hear me. Even over the loud beating of his heart, that I know Hinamori Amu is the cause of. That jealousy, that burning, it was eating me alive. Consuming me.

No one could have Ikuto, not Hinamori Amu nor Easter, because Ikuto was all mine. The ideal man, I knew of no other person to which Ikuto could compare. My older brother was good at everything. Nothing was a challenge for him, everything was just seen as a bother, a moment that could be laughed off with a tease, or tossed aside with a shrug.

But, now I'm flying down from above, my white wings spread out wide as I sing. My song helping **her**, which is making my insides shudder. **She** is going to be the one to save **my** Ikuto. The boy who **I** love. But, I glance at her face, and I see the horror lurking behind her golden irises. Every moment wasted, Ikuto is hurting further. She knows it, and so do I. Glaring at her, I scream for her to move on. _Save him!_ To take her lazy legs and run. _He'll want to see your face, he'll want to hear your voice…when he gets released from the dark._

And she goes to rescue him. That little prince trailing behind. Like a small puppy always by her side. But I know…that Ikuto **loves her** and that she **loves him**.

Even though Ikuto was my everything.

Even though I loved him.

Even though I needed him.

**I can be strong without him!**

Plus, in the distance I can hear it, a voice calling out my name. It's not as deep as Ikuto's, and it's far too lively in nature to ever resemble him. But, he calls out to me…in a way that Ikuto stopped doing long ago. And he knows just what to say to snap me out of my funk. To get me into the action, he taunts me:

"Betcha I can do more damage on this bestie than you can." He says it like a statement, but his eyes are sparkling and his lips are twisted in a smirk. He's teasing me. _Flirting_. And I follow along:

"We'll see about that, Little Jack."

"Hey, don't call me little! I'm the same age as you!"

"No, you're not, I'm a year older." I stopped my teasing. _My flirting_. And I start singing. My song echoing out from my lips, and I hear him stop talking. Right there, mid-sentence. And he just listens. My songs that were meant to be for Ikuto and Ikuto alone are being heard by him. But…_I don't really mind…_not really.

He continues attacking the beast, and I continue singing, while that little…what was her name again?..Yayu…or something, keeps trying to do damage, but fails. And then, that violin music that I had heard throughout our whole battle, stops. It was so faint and distant to begin with, but I know I wasn't imagining it. That had been Ikuto. Playing even though his fingers were bleeding and his body was sore and his eyes just wanted to shut and never open. No, nevermore. I could remember that feeling. Only it was my throat that felt as if it was bleeding, singing and singing and singing…for Ikuto…even though he stopped listening. Long ago.

My voice rises in volume, just slightly, trying desperately to tune out that newly created silence. **She** was the one who saved Ikuto in the end. **She** is the one who now has Ikuto wrapped protectively in her arms. **She **is the one bandaging his cut and bleeding fingers. **She **is the one who is experiencing a willing kiss from Ikuto. **She** is the one who has Ikuto staring at her, straight in the eyes, with his face all serious and whispering, "I love you," in a way that I'll never hear.

And the tears are pouring down. I can't stop them. Even though I thought I was strong enough to fight this. Even though I thought I could hide it. Even though I thought I could move on. But then I heard it, just like before, his voice so light and cherry…_is this the way Ikuto feels…when she talks to him?..._"Come on, just one more blow and this beastie is dead. Whoever gets the last hit…gets free ramen. Deal?"

I don't give him a response, I don't think he was expecting one, and I just sing all the louder. Hoping that my voice is consuming him and causing him to lose that wonderful thing called concentration. Because then he strikes…and he misses. But, my song, it soothes the beast, just like music is supposed to do. And my eyes sneak a glance over at him, with my lids partly closed, as a devious smile curls up my lips.

I'll make him buy me ramen, at the stall that I always like, and I'll eat until I can't anymore. Or perhaps until he goes broke. Then I'll drag him off to buy ice-cream, my treat. Then I'll take his hand in mine, and try my hardest to make him mine. Because I know now…_Ikuto is my brother_. I know that there are many others.

Ikuto…

I'll still love him.

And I'll still need him.

But Ikuto…

Ikuto…Ikuto isn't my everything.

No, not anymore.

"So, Little Jack, about that ramen…"

()

_A/N: This definitely ended up longer than I had planned it would be, but I'm not complaining. I'm actually really happy with how this turned out. I didn't really realize, until I started writing, just how complicated a brother complex actually is. College has zapped me of my fanfiction writing time, but I finally found some time to write…thus, here is the next installment. I hope you all enjoyed! Tell me what you think in a review and please take care. : )_

-LilyGinnyBlack-


	4. Complex Four: Peter Pan

_**Complex Four: Peter Pan**_

()

"Eh? Are you sure?" I could feel the air hit my eyes as they widened and my mouth flew open, but my words had slight trouble getting out. What was one supposed to say to something like this anyway?

"Yes, I'm sure."

"Are you really, really sure, Amu-chi?"

"I'm positive." Her voice broke into a slight laughter after that, she was apparently amused by the pun, but I wasn't. How could Amu-chi smile and laugh like that? After what she just told me she should be in tears! She should be terrified!

…I know I would be. I'm still a child, if I was told that _I_ had a child growing within _me_, I would be crying and crying. We're too young to be thinking about another human being. I mean, boys are still just toys…right? And sex is just another game…isn't?

"Maybe the test was wrong." I put hope in my voice, though it seemed more for my sake then for hers.

"It wasn't wrong, I had it checked out by a doctor too, Yaya. Rima went with me." I wasn't upset with Amu for telling Rima before me; I would have just made the whole situation worse. "I was…a little shocked…at first. But Rima really helped me."

Aha, so she had been afraid! But, she wasn't now…Why? How?..."Have you told Ikuto yet? What about your parents? They're going to kill you, ya know!"

Her face was calm and so were her eyes, as she looked down at me (Amu-chi was always so tall for her age!) and she placed her hands on her abdomen, "I've told him. We knew what we were doing, Yaya. Well, I mean, this whole this is _unexpected_, for sure, but it wasn't an _accident_ or a _mistake_. Ikuto and I will deal with the consequences, and it's not like we haven't talked about it before…"

"What, having a kid!" My voice shot back at her, louder and sharper than I had planned.

"Yaya, not so loud! You know how nosey people are here…" Yes, I knew, since I was one of those nosey people, and I suddenly felt bad about it. But, the drama that goes on in high school was just too exciting to ignore, and really, since the Embryo was found…nothing was fun anymore! Everyone was always too busy with work or _love_ to hang out together. How unfair!

And now Amu-chi is just looking at me, it's that same look that my mom always gives me when she wants to make sure that I'm listening to her. It's weird to see her pull off that look so easily…it doesn't seem to be hard for her at all! "…Uh, yeah…yeah, sorry, I won't talk so loud from now on." My voice is a volume lower as I speak.

"Good. Like I was saying before, Ikuto and I have talked about marriage before, for about a year now. Kids came up every once and a while…but, well, now that this has happened…I've never seen Ikuto so happy." She was happy too. Her eyes were sparkling.

"That-that's great. So, uh, do you know what you would want? A boy or a girl?" My voice is even lower than when I had last spoken, feeling like a child learning that they were gaining a sibling…and hating that sibling with all their might. It's the same way I had felt about Tsubasa, in the beginning. How disgusting. How selfish. How…childish.

She's biting her lip now, not out of nerves though, more out of thought. Amu's really thinking it over when she replies back, her words coming out of her mouth carefully, "Well…Ikuto told me…that he would like a little boy." Blushing, though in a way so different from when we were younger, she goes on, "He-he wants to be a really good father. Ikuto…Ikuto wants to have a son…so he can do all of the things that his birth father never got to do for him…or with him. It's really sweet. His eyes get all nervous when he looks at me, but I never see regret in them. Never."

"I asked about _you_, Amu-chi, not Ikuto!" Finally, I can laugh, even if it's small and barely there.

Amu's blushing again, but in that way that she used to, meaning that she was embarrassed. "Oh, well, I want a boy too. I've had enough of girls. I mean, I practically brought Ami up…and, well, a little boy would be nice. Girls are so complicated and dramatic, boys are far simpler. Don't you think?"

I can't answer her question. How could I? My mother though, she would jump right into this conversation, agreeing completely with Amu. "Oh yes," she would say, "Boys are a blessing next to girls. They may be messier and a little more rowdy when they're younger, but girls can just get nasty in their teenage years." And I can see Amu smiling as she nods her agreement.

How scary. When did this happen? When did Amu become an adult, when did she grow up?

"Oh! Look at the time. Yaya, I really have to go. Ikuto is going to pick me up, we're going for a check-up, and then we're heading to my parents. I hope everything goes okay." Grabbing her shoes from the cubby and placing her in-school slippers in their place, Amu heads out the entrance of the school, her bag held loosely in her hands.

My mind is still in a somewhat cloudy haze, still imagining that conversation between my mother and Amu, and still unsure what to make of it. But, I am able to call out to her, "Good luck…and take care…Amu-chi."

She was gone before my lips were even parted.

()

My mom had known something was up; I had barely eaten at dinner and mostly ignored Tsubasa's eight-year old taunts (they usually worked so well!) But, for once, I think I was acting like an adult. My mind was so filled with this and that…I couldn't concentrate on anything. I couldn't even listen to music properly, so there was no way that homework was getting done, even if end of the year exams weren't that far away.

I had everything on my mind…everyone.

Kukai had called before, he told me how he heard the news from Utau, and he sounded slightly distressed when he mentioned how Utau wouldn't stop crying. I tried to be grown up and tell him that she was crying because she was happy…not because she still, somewhere in her heart, loved Ikuto…but now, now I think I wasn't like an adult at all. An adult would have told him the truth.

And that made me wonder about love…about life. Kukai has to deal with someone who truly does love him (Utau really does! One of her songs is even about him!) But, when reminded of what she could have had, seems to forget that love so easily for her old flame. For her brother. On top of that he has to give his all to his soccer career; he's almost there, almost a star like Utau. Like Ikuto.

Would Amu and Ikuto be alright? The economy wasn't all that great now, and Amu was still only eighteen…it was going to be so hard for them. She just took it all in stride, and Ikuto is the type to do the same. Never mind the fact that money isn't really an issue, not with the amount of dough Ikuto dragged in with his violin. He worked hard.

Nagihiko worked hard too, being on the basketball team and still keeping up on his dancing. Always so busy, with that…and girls too, since he cut his hair the fangirls grew. They just won't leave him alone, no matter how much he tries to run away from them. I let myself giggle, let myself lose control-just for a minute-then I get composed again. The color of my room, that bright pinkness, it was nearly blinding me and only helping to secure my insomnia. Rima and Tadase weren't helping either.

They're the King and Queen of the high school, a beautiful pair, and one that compliments the other. Where Rima is blunt and somewhat cruel, Tadase simply smiles and apologizes and where Tadase clams up, unable to speak his mind, Rima would tell the whole world what his problem was. They were meant to be; just like Amu and Iktuo and just like Kukai and Utau.

Who was meant for me? Who do I have to help me grow up? Who do I have…to help with that transition from a child to an adult. Amu doesn't want another little girl, and Rima has her hands full with Tadase, while Kukai must worry a lot about Utau. So…who is left for me?

The phone is ringing; I can hear it echoing throughout the whole house. No one is picking up though. Do they all just figure it's for me? Sure, most of the phone calls that came through this house were from my friends, but really, did it happen that much that _everyone_ else wouldn't even bother with it? It must. I sigh. The insomnia wasn't going away anytime soon, might as well do something useful.

Taking the stairs two at a time, I zoom down them and snatch up the phone on its last ring before the answering machine would pick it up, "Moshi, moshi." My voice comes out slightly cracked, dry and tired from the inability to find comfort in sleep.

"Ah, is this…Yaya-san?" The man speaking on the other side of the line sounds remotely familiar, but no name came to mind. He knew mine though, how odd.

"Erm…Yes, I'm Yaya."

"Ah, good. It's Kairi." **Kairi**! I could feel my eyes widen for a second time that day. How many years had it been since any of us had heard from him. No wonder I couldn't place his voice, last time I had heard it, his vocal cords were still making it crack at unexpected places (making it all…awkward and stuff…ya know.) What was he doing calling me? So late at night, too.

"Sorry about the late hour, but I just got in, the plane I had taken had gotten delayed. I tried calling Amu's house, but no one picked up." Ah, so that was the reason then. "I thought you might know."

"You still have my number after all this time?" Disbelieve was rather evident in my tone, but I didn't particularly care, I really was shocked. Him having Amu's number was believable, even expected, but for him to have mine…

I was greeted to silence for a short while. "You always seemed so close to Amu."

I snort, "Yeah, well, Amu and Rima are closer now. But, I can tell you what you want to know."

"Oh…I see." He sounds slightly ashamed, as if my passing jealousy was his fault, "I'll be right there. Do you want me to help you study too, end of the year exams are coming up soon, right?"

I'm thinking, "Well, I, ye-" And he hung up. Just like that! So, that meant that Kairi was on his way here, textbooks and all, how fun…Not understanding fully why I was complaining, I mean, it's not like I had anything better to do than try to go to sleep (and failing quite badly at that), I wait for Kairi in the living room.

After a short period of waiting I hear the door bell ring and open it to find Kairi standing there. He still wears glasses, his eyes are still as sharp as ever, and his hair is still black and still short. He still carries bags and books and folders in his arms. He really hasn't changed. Not at all. I can still see the ten-year old boy that I remember.

It was in that moment, that I finally understood something. As my legs were carrying me, and leading him, up the stairs towards my room, I thought about everyone again…differently this time. I can hear the strain in Amu's calm tone as she tells me that she is pregnant, I can feel the hurt that Kukai goes through every time Utau cries for _Ikuto_ and not him, I can imagine the boulder upon my shoulders as I imagine the daily routines of Nagihiko, and I can almost scream out loud over the frustrations Tadase and Rima must feel when it comes to the fellow teens in our school, all with their high expectations for them, because they were king and queen.

As I turned the door handle, the inside of my mind was letting off fireworks. I finally got it! Being an adult doesn't mean never being a child, it just means one knows when and where to behave as an adult and when and where to behave as a child. And it also means…one knows how cover up those childish moments that slip through.

I lead Kairi into my room. _I want to master this now_…He drops the pile of books and folders onto the bed, and I wonder when will be an appropriate time to bring up Amu's predicament. "So, what subjects are you having trouble in?"

Well, maybe later, after I've done some studying. "I don't know really. Everything…I guess."

"Better than nothing." I just catch him muttering this, but I do nothing in retaliation.

_I want to master this now…I want to be able to become an adult…_

I cannot do it alone though, and it's going to be hard, just like this math problem that I'm doing. **Trying to do **being the key words here.

"I'm a little lost." Those words weren't meant to be spoken out loud, but they were, and Kairi had heard them.

"Where? In this section?" He pointed to some title in the index of one his books.

_No_. "Everywhere. Please, Kairi-kun, help me!" He takes my offer. I wonder if he knows what exactly I want his help in, but he just understands, just knows, which is both relieving and unnerving at the same time.

I think he does get the message though, because he bookmarks his page and then pulls me into a hug. My tears leaking out from the corners of my eyes, and I know that this is highly unusual in comparison to his normal address. This close contact…then again, maybe his sister had been similar to this, a mess of a woman, unsure of her love and unsure of her place in the world. Just like me. Wiping away my tears, catching my breath with short little gasps, doing this until they disappear into nice, long intakes of air, I can finally speak again, "How is Sanjou-san doing?"

"Ah, she's not Sanjou-san anymore." He laughs heartily here. "It's Nikaidou now. Weird, huh. That those two finally got their act together."

"Eh! Really? When?" Here I am, shocked all over again, though this time _I'm_ not as scared (though neither is Kairi).

"A few years ago, not long after Easter was destroyed and the Embryo was found." He states it in his matter-of-fact tone, pushing his slightly sliding glasses up the bridge of his nose.

I'm not quite sure of what to say. What should I ask? "Oh, well, um, how are they doing?"

"Fine, though Nee-san is being a pain of late."

"Oh, why?" I really am curious now. Homework be forgotten, here was a chance for drama. How I loved drama! It was so refreshing from this dramatic-free life of mine.

"Pregnant, with her second kid. Though, I have to wonder sometimes about those two. They are like two over-grown children, and responsibility was never a strong point…for either of them. But, their hearts are in the right place, so everything will be alright in the end." He continues on, informing me of all the things that he has to do, and I'm reminded of Amu.

A boy and a girl, the same age as me, but they are both so mature. They are both so old beyond their years. And, right now, I'm not frightened or jealous of them…right now, I feel really sad. "How long have you been like this, Kairi-kun?"

"Huh, been like what?"

"How long have you taken care of your _older_ sister?"

"I…I don't remember anymore." His whispers this, shy to admit such a thing. I give him a small smile.

"Come on!" I reach for his hand, grasping it in my own. If I'm not sleeping tonight, then he isn't either. We're going to go to that old amusement park that Amu told me about once (she told me how it was a wonderful place to start anew).

I may be small and weigh little for my age, but Kairi is no problem to drag along, too surprised to put up any kind of resistance. Our textbooks and papers and pens are scattered all over the bed, but I gave up caring for the night. Right now…

Right now, I want to be the adult.

"Tonight, we're going to have some fun!" I wonder if my eyes are glowing in the moonlight, as we sneak out of my house (which really isn't an issue, my parents never bother to ask where I go _or_ when I will be home)? I feel as if they should be that they should be alight with excitement. But, as we start heading towards the amusement park, my running slows to a walk, and suddenly Kairi is by my side. Our hands are still connected. Held together by the red thread of fate, perhaps? Or maybe I'm just being my romantic self again. I think that might be more accurate. Our hands are only still in the other because _we want_ them to be.

When I was younger, I always used to have to talk to fill in the silence. I couldn't stand the lack of noise, the lack of rambling and whatnot to take your mind off things, but right now, I don't mind it all that much.

As the amusement park nears, I can hear Kairi's strong strides turn into small shuffles. "What's the matter?" I ask him without even turning around.

"Shouldn't you be doing studying for your exams?"

"What about you?" I calmly respond back.

"I skipped a year. I'm already in University, so I took my exams last week. I figured I'd come back here for a visit."

Oh, well I sure felt stupid right now. "I see. Well, I'm going to be the adult tonight. **You** need to have some fun. Acting like an adult all the time is no good, ya know." By now, I had spun around and faced him, my eyes sharp like his, sharp with determination. His are wide.

"When did you become an adult?" His question is short and to the point, just like how I remember him being.

I don't even have to think about the answer, I know it, right off the top of my head. "This afternoon. Amu-chi told me something."

"What?" He's curious, I knew he would be.

"She's pregnant." There, I said it, and this time…This time I'm not afraid. Not at all.

()

_A/N: Hey everyone! I thought I'd update since I'm on Thanksgiving break I have the time. This one-shot turned out to be __**way**__ longer than I thought it would be. Anyway, please tell me what you think of it in a review and take care everyone. : ) Happy Turkey Day!_

-LilyGinnyBlack-


	5. Complex Five: Inferiority or Superiority

Complex Five: Inferiority or Superiority….?

-()-

"_From now on, I'm going to tell you I love you every day. As much as I can."*_

I meant it too.

Every day, when I said those words to you.

They used to make you blush.

They used to make you stammer.

But now…

"_I love you."_

How many years have I said that simple word to you.

"_Love…"_

My heart still hammers in my chest.

As my voice grows softer.

"_Ta-ta-tadase-kun!"_

You used to shout that, your face bright red.

I can remember smiling, my eyes glowing.

At those moments…

In that time…

I felt like I could take over the world.

Just like Kiseki wanted.

_But now-_

"_I love you."_

I keep saying, I've been saying, since we were in 6th grade.

We're third years in high school.

And I never say it out loud.

I stopped last year.

_I wonder if I had given up from the start…?_

Everyone thinks I'm a king.

Figuratively, of course.

But I know that you did too.

Your hand raised in the air-

_Even if it was against your own will-_

Proclaiming your love to me-

_You wanted to tell me after all, deep down inside-_

And your eyes were sparkling-

_You were blinded by my princely presence. _

Then you met me.

_Truly met me._

And I was no king.

I could have been-for you.

_Just you._

I'll keep telling you I love you.

Even after our last meeting.

Even after I take you away from him.

_One last time_.

After all, I did tell you,

"_From now on, I'm going to tell you I love you every day. As much as I can."_

And I did.

I shouted it once.

I whispered it in your ear.

Then I silently told myself.

And I'll continue through the years.

_Because, I know now._

I didn't see it then.

Your blush made it hard to see.

You being 'Cool and Spicy' made it harder.

_That your heart already belonged to another._

You wanted to hear, "I love you", but not from me.

_Because your heart, your heart didn't flutter._

I glance over at Kiseki.

_All of them are fading now._

And I grin.

_Bittersweet._

I may say I love you, for as long as I can,

But one day-

_I'll get over you._

-()-

_A/N: This: * indicates that the line was taken directly from the **online** English translation of Chapter 29, therefore, it does not belong to me._


	6. Complex Six: Gender

Complex Six: Gender

_A/N: A double upload, that's right! I figured, since I took so long to update this fic, I'd give my readers a little treat. : ) Also, this is probably the only time that I'll have to write for a while, first day of Spring semester, so very little homework. The rest of the semester, I have a feeling, will be jam packed. So enjoy!_

-()-

He knew which one he wanted. Knew what he wanted to be. A boy. Not a girl. But, sometimes the confusion wouldn't leave him alone. Sometimes he would sit, legs crossed, in such a girly fashion, and sometimes he would giggle instead of chuckle.

Even though years passed.

Just like he had almost forgotten he was a boy, recently, he sometimes remembered to vividly how he had been a girl. It unnerved him.

But then he would see her. She used to stick close to Tadase's side. They had looked good together, but he didn't like it.

In fact, he hated it.

She was free now, not clinging to him anymore.

And sometimes he would catch her staring, but not in the way she used to. The intensity was different. The challenge was gone -replaced- but he would just smirk back at her.

She would sometimes blush, other times she would look away so quickly that he couldn't tell if she was or not. He guessed that she was.

He felt like a boy then.

The day her hair grew longer than his. The day when he thought that she looked better than ever.

He felt like a boy then too.

Over the years, as her features became more pronounced. When she had called him handsome and not beautiful.

That time too…a boy.

But now, as his lips crashed down on hers. As his hands explored. As they both let their desires take over. As he heard her give a soft moan of pleasure at the touch of his fingers on her flesh, and as he heard her cry out his name. Then…

Right then…

He felt like a man.

-()-

_A/N: Tell me what you think of it in a review and take care!_

-LilyGinnyBlack-


	7. Complex Seven: Shota

_**Complex Seven: Shota**_

_A/N: Hey there everyone! Gosh, this one-shot just…grew? I don't know. It turned out longer than I had planned, but that's okay. I had to give some background, mind you; most of this one-shot is pure speculation on my part, since we don't know much about this character. Anyway, I hope you enjoy! _

-()-

My parents had died when I had been no more than five years old. So, my aunt and uncle had taken me in, without a problem, even though they had been a newly wedded couple that was far too young and unprepared for caring for a child. Especially for child like myself, who had been in emotional distress. But they had taken it in stride. They had been there for me constantly, a boy who wasn't their child, but who they had treated as such. And then, years later, at an age when I had been able to take of myself, no problem, they had a child of their own.

Tadase. Cute, little Tadase. He was the brother I always wanted, but who I could never have. We were too far apart in age; there was no way I could be a brother to him. The fact that we were only loosely connected by blood made no difference to me. As he grew, as they grew as a family, I watched from far away. Watched as they became acquaintances with another couple, who had two children only slightly older than Tadase. A little girl and a little boy.

Utau and Ikuto. Her with golden hair and him with dark black, nearly blue. It was then that I became entranced by the little boy who always seemed to be pouting. Too young to have such a sad face, too young to have that blank expression that he sometimes wore. But…that drew me to him more. A boy, who didn't look so much like me that everyone kept saying he must be my brother. It was a first.

I couldn't look away, and I didn't want to.

So, I would watch after them, as their parents would work, I would do my homework and listen to their bickering. Bickering that became more complex as they grew. Tadase would latch onto Ikuto, always with tears in his eyes. Sometimes those tears would be out of pain; Tadase had fallen and scrapped his knee, other times out of anger, anytime Utau would claim Ikuto as hers.

I would chuckle, fascinated by the three small children. A part of my heart would ache, though. It ached every time Tadase wanted Ikuto and Ikuto's attention alone, and every time Ikuto would give it to him. Somewhere in my heart, and sometimes in my mind, I would think of how the slightly older boy was mine and mine alone, that he could not belong to the other nor could he belong to anyone else.

What a selfish thought that had been.

As they grew, as I moved out of that house and went on with my life. As Utau and Ikuto cried when their father left, as Ikuto's frown was all I ever saw on his face. _I tried to forget about him._ Just as Tadase eventually forgot who I was, as I lost all ties with that side of my family.

**I tried to forget about him.**

But then, that one time, at my favorite spot, there he was- Ikuto. The boy was talking to a small cat-like creature that seemed to be floating in mid-air. I had no idea what to make of the situation. What was going on?

"There you are!" His voice had been excited, Ikuto's voice had been excited…I hadn't been used to it. And…as I had gotten closer to him, it was then that I had noticed the ears and tail that adorned his body. Where had they come from? Were they store bought…? But, no they had looked all too real…

I could remember the tears that had begun to fill Ikuto's then large eyes, as I, unintentionally, pulled hard on one of his ears.

"Ow! That hurt!"

"They're real?"

"Of course they are! Why wouldn't they be?" Ikuto glared at me as he spoke, those large irises narrowing, giving him the appearance, for the first time, of an angry, stray cat. Though, then, an angry, stray kitten, would be more fitting.

"Humans don't have cat ears and tails, Ikuto-chan." I informed him, a smile on my face, as I took a seat next to him in the dark planetarium.

He had tried hard to make his face serious when he spoke next, "Don't. Call. Me. Ikuto. Chan." He emphasized each syllable. "I'm not a little boy anymore." That was true, though he would always been seen as a little boy to me. "And, Yoru gave them to me."

"Yoru, you mean this little guy?" I pointed to the odd miniature cat, floating beside his head.

Ikuto jumped up, eyes wide with excitement, "You mean you can see him!" He quickly caught himself though, and gained his composure. "I mean…no one's been able to see him yet, 'sides me."

"I see." I paused. "So, is that Yoru?"

"Yeah."

I turned to Yoru, addressing him for the first time, "It's a pleasure to meet you. My name is Amakawa Tsukasa. I work part time here, at the planetarium, but one day I plan on becoming superintendent at this school. It's been a dream of mine. Please favor me, yeah." I titled my head slightly at him, smiling, than I gave him my hand to shake.

"Nice ta meet 'cha, nya. I'm Yoru, and I'm…I…nya…" He trailed off, as he shook my hand, face slightly blushed in embarrassment of not exactly knowing what he was.

"It's okay, you know, not knowing what you are. I'm sure you'll find out soon enough." I had said that statement, had directed it at Yoru, but I had meant it for Ikuto and myself as well. I wanted to know what Yoru was. "So, Ikuto, how did you find this place?"

"I was looking for you, so I decided to ask some people."

"Why did you want to see me?"

"No one can see Yoru. Mama isn't like she used to be, and I don't like my new Papa. Utau cries a lot. I don't want to go home anymore." He had been closed to tears then.

My heart had been broken. Such a small child wasn't supposed to think about such things, notice such things, or cry about such things. But Ikuto did. He was never like the other children.

_I had tried to keep my distance…_

_I failed._

"Come on, Ikuto." I had held out my hand for him to take, which he did, without reluctance. "You can stay with me for a while. We'll figure out what Yoru is, and then you have to promise me that you'll return home. Utau is going to need you, and she's going to miss you if you stay away too long."

_I had told him that, but really, I didn't want to become anymore attached than I already was…_

"Okay."

-()-

"Stop playing with my ears, you perv!" Ikuto is shouting at me, all the while pouting, his ears are pressed down close to his head.

I laugh feebly, "Sorry, sorry, old habits die hard, I suppose." My hands reaching for the catnip I have hidden in my pocket.

"Don't even think about it." Ikuto had caught me, saying a phrase that could be quite threatening, even in his deadpan like voice.

"Sorry, sorry." Another dying laugh.

"Yeah, whatever." He turns his back to me.

We slip into silence.

A few years after I had found Ikuto here, at this planetarium, Tadase had been sitting right where he had been. A little boy, who had looked like a cosplaying king, had been floating by his side. By that time I had known what it was, a Chara, and I had known what to tell Tadase.

Tadase who had grown, but who was still a child. Tadase who no longer latched onto Ikuto for everything, who now hated the boys guts and wanted nothing to do with him.

How I had abhorred the contentment my heart had felt when I had heard this…

"Why are you here, Ikuto?"

He gets up, his back to me, and his tail and ears vanish. "I'm going." I watch his retreating back.

He's not a little boy anymore, not technically speaking, but I still see him as he had once been. And every time he comes, every time he comes to see me, every time he complains about Tadase…

My heart flutters.

Every time he mentions Amu, the Joker, and every time I examine the stars and notice how they draw closer…

My heart falters.

I try to forget about him, but I keep forgetting instead…that Ikuto has to let go first.

-()-

_A/N: A Shota complex is basically like a Lolita complex, yet it is directed at young boys rather than young girls. It is not as well known, or as common, but there is a following for Shota anime and manga in Japan, just like there is for Lolita. The most well known Shota anime/manga is _Loveless_, which happens to be an excellent series that I highly recommend. Anyway, take care everyone!_

-LilyGinnyBlack-


	8. Complex Eight: Father

_**Complex Eight: Father**_

_A/N: Once again, I take some liberties with this one-shot, since I go into unexplored grounds and use some of my own personal opinions. Anyway, please enjoy!_

-()-

I wanted to be the best father that I could be. The moment I held Amu in my hands, I wanted to be everything for her. I wanted to protect her. Then Ami came, and I reminded myself of these things.

**I wanted to be the perfect father!**

That's why, when Amu introduced me to Ikuto for the first time. I fainted, and then I cried.

And now, Ami's saying, "Papa, I want you to meet my boyfriend…"

I can't even listen to the rest.

I'm heading for the bathroom.

Now I'm locking the door.

-()-

Every night I sit in a tree, nearby, and listen to the violin, as he plays it into the star-filled night sky. The moon is sometimes big enough and bright enough that I can see his outline. An outline that slowly started growing, I don't know what his face looks like, or what his voice sounds like, but I know how tall he is. And I know that he can play the violin just as well as I had been able to.

The way he plays the violin, pizzicato, that's how I'm sure that this shadow I sometimes see, is actually him.

I want to see him, truly see him, his body and not just an outline.

I want to talk to him, hear his voice, and examine his facial expressions.

I want to be his father.

But I can't.

Never will.

So now, all I can do is continue listening to the songs he plays to himself, and wonder when they'll stop sounding so sad.

-()-

_"I want Papa!" "I miss Papa!" "When is Papa coming home, Mama?" "Will Papa sing us a song tonight, will he be home tonight?"_

As they latched onto their mother, that seemed to be the only thing that those brats could do, they blurted out question after question, always about their father. Never about the woman who was caring for them. Such ungrateful little things they were too. The boy especially, whose face was always so stoic. He was never showing emotions, except for when he would inquire about his father.

What was so great about the man?

He left his wife.

He left these brats to whine and cry.

What was so great about being a father?

As their complaints continued, and then died over the years, once they finally gave up on their father. I thought there might be something great about being one, the ability to have your children do whatever you want them to do.

But, then they went and disobeyed me.

And now I knew.

There was nothing great about being a father.

Nothing at all.

-()-

Her grip on my hand loosened, as the pain inducing procedure came to an end. A smile was on her face. Sweat kept her hair planted to her head and forehead, and her eyelids seemed ready to drop at any moment. But, they stayed open and alert still, her breaths deep and long as she tried to gain her energy back as quickly as possible.

"Here you go dear." The soft voice of the nurse made me take my eyes off of her. My attention instantly taken by the small bundle of blankets Amu held so carefully in her arms. Her golden eyes turning to me, as she smiled.

I could just barely get my mind to function, so my lips were only able to produce a minuscule smile back. "Do you want to hold him?"

I did. And I was positive that my eyes expressed this longing, because Amu simply presented the bundle of blankets, which were wrapped protectively around our son, to me. And as I examined every tiny feature, from the still closed eyes to the slightly scrunched nose to his impatient hands, which would squeeze weakly at the air, to his steady rising and falling chest; I realized I couldn't look away.

He was my son, my child. I would do everything I could for him. Everything my birth father could never be, and everything that my step father wasn't, I would do and be. I made that promise to myself. I heard a giggle and glanced over at Amu.

"What?" It was an honest question too.

"Is this the making of another complex?" Her lips turned upward in a smirk, and one of her eyebrows rose, which almost turned the question into a jest.

Our son let out a minute yawn, and I couldn't help but think that this was. Of course, I would never tell Amu that.

-()-

_A/N: I hope that I'm not the only one who is of the belief that we might see Ikuto's birth father appearing in the manga someday. So, I took a lot of liberties with him, and obviously with Ikuto at the end, since we haven't gotten that far in the future cannon-wise. I also manipulated a Father complex…kinda. _

_Technically speaking, a father complex would only apply to Ikuto, since he wants to be better than the father's he had. But, I also think that one can have a complex of actually __**being**__ a father. Wanting to be the best father one can be, being afraid of being a father and thus waning off responsibility, or absolutely abhorring the thought, and thus being a horrible father. _

_So, like I said, I took some liberties and manipulated here and there, but I hope you all liked it, and please take care! Next chapter is the last, and it is, of course, Amu! _

-LilyGinnyBlack-


	9. Complex Nine: Shadow

_**Complex Nine: Shadow**_

-()-

"You want that, don't you?"

"Of course not! It's way too girlish and cute!"

I hide my smile with a simple turn of my head. "So…you do want it then." I held in my laughter, two could easily play this game.

"I _told you_, Mama, this outfit is just _not_ me!" Swallowing my laughter, I let out a sigh, and consciously blaming our oldest child's stubbornness all onto Ikuto, I'm fully aware that she had obviously gotten my 'Cool and Spicy' outer personality.

"You _do_ want it, so I'm going to buy it for you."

I watch her eyes widen in panic as I reach for the Sweet Lolita outfit on the rack. "N-no! Mama, y-you can't! Look at that price, ￥10, 400, that's way too much money! I-I won't let you buy it! I-I won't…" Her attempts to try and stop me from buying the adorable outfit were falling on deaf ears, and she was very much aware of it. If the fading of her voice at the end was any indication.

"So, it went from being _too cute_ to _too expensive_, huh." I smile while turning my back to her, already beginning my gait toward the checkout counter. "Besides, your father and I both told you that it's okay. Even if it's expensive, that's okay; you really worked hard to get into that High School. We're both really proud of you. So, let us buy this for you." I was talking softly to her; there was no need to be loud. I could hear her footsteps as they followed behind me.

I could also imagine how she looked at the moment, her bangs, which were long like the rest of her messy, black-blue hair, would just barely be covering her side casted blue eyes. A light blush was probably on her cheeks too. She was the spitting image of Ikuto, yet…

_She acts just like I used to…_

I feel her hand clasp onto my free one, and I hold onto it tightly, giving it a small squeeze. I want her to know that I understand. She's still slightly behind me, but she doesn't let go.

I stop walking once I meet up with the line headed for the checkout counter. As we wait in line, I speak quietly to her again, "I understand. I was just like you when I was your age…younger actually."

She stays silent, of course, I expect nothing less.

"One day you'll have a light in your life that will shine so brightly, you won't be able to see the shadows anymore. Everyone has a shadow following them, another self, who's everything that you want to be, or everything you fear to be. But, eventually, you become that person that you always wanted to be." A woman left the counter, headed for the exit, the line moved up slightly. I took a step; Mizuki took a step behind me.

"The shadow will always be there, it will still follow you, but it won't haunt you anymore. I promise." Another person was done. We both took another step closer to the counter. There was only one more to go.

Mizuki mumbled under her breath, "Yeah right…"

"I promise."

"What was your light then?" Her tone was defiant. I laughed. She got upset. "Don't laugh, Mama, it isn't funny!"

She was right, I really shouldn't have laughed. It was just… the resemblance was too odd sometimes. "It wasn't a what, it was a who."

"Fine, who then?"

"Your father." Short. Simple. To the point.

The man in front of us, accompanied by his daughter, or so I assumed, who seemed rather flustered and somewhat reluctant to pay the amount that was displayed on the screen, finally did. The young girl snatched the bag off of the counter, as if she were ready to devour the outfit that lay within it, and they made their way to the exit. Just like the customers before them.

Without batting an eye, and somewhat surprised to not hear my daughter try and get one last complaint in, I bought the outfit. Watched as the female behind the counter gently placed it in a bag and then handed it over to Mizuki. Face still lightly flushed she took the bag. I took her free hand in mine. We walked out of the exit together, side by side.

As the sliding doors opened and we stepped outside, Mizuki spoke, her words so low I almost didn't hear them, "…Thank you…I really did want it."

"I know; that's why I bought it." I glanced to my side, making eye contact with eyes so different in color, but so similar in appearance to mine, and smiled.

She gave a small smile back. I was making some progress with her.

"You're welcome."

She squeezed my hand and I squeezed back.

-()-

_A/N: That's it, that's the end. Before I get into saying my thanks and such, here are some notes on this chapter._

_First, a Shadow complex is the unconscious part of our minds that hold our weakness, short comings, and etc. Everyone has a Shadow, not everyone has a Shadow complex though. I think it's fair to say though, that all of the characters in _Shugo Chara _that have a Chara-have a Shadow complex. You can't get over complexes, but like Amu said, you can acknowledge that you have one, and then learn to deal with it._

_Second, 10, 400 yen, is about 104.00 dollars, give or take. That's a lot of money for a dress, but Lolita dresses of any kind can get way up there, this would actually be deemed as cheap!_

_Thirdly, and lastly, Mizuki (__美月__) means Beauty + Moon, a fitting name for an Amuto child, I think. : )_

_Now, I want to say thank you to each and every reviewer. Your insights and thoughts on this series of one-shots in general were wonderful and I appreciate them greatly! I had so much fun writing this, and hopefully, not too far in the future, I'll be able to do another series of _Shugo Chara _one-shots. 'Till then, take care everyone!_

-LilyGinnyBlack-


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